Buying a TV

Hello Everyone,

I originally sent out this email on December 5th, 2012.

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As some of you may know, Anna and I recently stamped our Yuppy passports by buying a flat screen TV. It wasn't the smoothest of processes. The thing about new TVs and buying new TVs is that there are people out there who are way too into it. It skews the perspective for the rest of us. For them, getting a deal is everything, so if you walk out of the store with a TV for less than $1,000, you basically just robbed the place the deal was so good. This is the cohort that was willing to spend 5 times that when the first flat screens came out that, under certain circumstances, would give you a better picture quality, for certain shows. But if you stop and ask yourself whether what you just bought was really worth $1,000 to you, doubt begins to creep into your mind. Now, keep in mind that I am the kind of person who would gladly pay $3,000 for the right bicycle, so maybe my judgement isn't the clear-headed rationalism that I think it is.

But it most likely is, and I certainly operate under that assumption. We paid $500 for ours, and jumped on the extended warranty. (See Dogs - Having them) The first thing we did with our new TV was stuff it in the trunk of the car, where it did not fit, and then in the back seat of the car with the dogs, who are substantially less excited about the prospect of High Definition television if it means taking up a portion of their seating space. The next thing we did with our TV was leave it in the car with the dogs for an hour or two as we did some errands and got back to work. Arthur promptly chewed the corner of the box, because that's the kind of thing he does. No damage to the TV, but the extended warranty business is starting to look like a master stroke. Next, we got it in the house and left it there for a few more hours as we did more running around. Our roommate was so excited that she called me to ask when we would be home to set it up. Note - it wasn't taking up any of her seating space. Then, when we were finally home and ready to unpack it, we did so enthusiastically, until we realized that they did not include the screws that would secure the TV to the base. Awesome. You see, the deal we got was so good, they gave us the floor model, which meant they had to disassemble and repack it in the box. They forgot the screws. (Editor's note: we went back to the store the next day and got the screws. They were sitting on the shelf where the TV had been.) Never one to let a lack of proper fastening prevent me from going forward, I found a few spare screws that kinda fit in the hole so that the TV could sit, unsteadily, on our stand. I backed this arrangement up with some twine attached to the window frame. The combination of cutting edge and more antiquated technologies was like having a hand crank on an iPhone. But it stayed up. Next, we hooked up our DVD player and prepared ourselves to be amazed by the incredible sharpness and clarity of, drum roll please... black and white television! That's right, we paid a bunch of money to switch from a perfectly good, if bulky, television, to a slim, sleek version that would now only play pre-1950s movies properly. We played with the wires and various ports on the back of the TV, of which there are many, and we tried different players, but nothing would work. We left it, defeated, for the night. The next day, the satellite guy came to hook us up. True to form for our experience so far, he had a flat tire on his way and had to show up later than expected. Not a big deal, but funny. Anyway, on a cold, windy day, he scampered up on the roof and installed the dish, drilled holes in our floor and ran the cable through. He did a really good job, and then we asked him about the black and white. He finally figured it out. You see, the cables we were using, RCA cables, are different than the ones the TV had ports for. We were supposed to use what are called Component cables. The TV was so new, it didn't even have ports for the kind of cables they used way back in the Olden Days when they made DVD players. How quaint of us to think otherwise. Hey, maybe if we tune it to the right frequency, we can get the internet to come in. Anyway, this is where we are at now. We have colour for our DVDs and satellite television. The picture is still a little flat, looks like a home movie when we watch certain shows. We're going to have to spend a bit more time figuring out the colour and such. The dogs are still unimpressed.

wes

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